First, $l_a$ is not the transpose of $l^a$. There would typically be a sign change on some components to account for the metric. This is referred to as the adjoint instead, and the transpose is equal to the adjoint only for the Euclidean metric. Compare with quantum mechanics, where you often deal with the conjugate transpose. This is also called the adjoint.
You're confusing yourself because you're thinking that $l_a$ and $m_b$ are row vectors and that the multiplication operation here is matrix multiplication. That gives you the right answer in the scalar product case, but it doesn't work here.
Consider: given a vector $v^b$, the quantity $U_{ab} v^b$ would describe a matrix $U$ acting on a vector $v$ to produce a covector. Hm, no, that doesn't work either: matrices don't ever do that.
Consider again: define ${U^a}_b = g^{ac} U_{cb}$. Now we can do ${U^a}_b v^b = g^{ac} (-l_c m_b + +l_b m_c) v^b$.
Something you should get used to: index notation doesn't rely on terms in a product being adjacent. You should infer the corresponding matrix products from indices being summed over. That's one way you could realize that $l_a m_b$ doesn't correspond to row-vector column-vector multiplication: there is no common index to sum over.
Now, how can you read this? Consider $g^{ac}(-l_c m_b) v^b$. The $g^{ac} l_c$ part turns a covector into a regular vector, so we get $l^a m_b v^b$. There's a name for this: the tensor product. It's sometimes denoted by multiplying a column vector onto a row vector. Usually, it'd be written $(l \otimes m)(v)$. Either way, you should recognize $l^a m_b$ as describing a matrix formed a column vector and a row vector. Again, in index notation, order is not important. $m_b l^a$ corresponds to the same matrix. It is the placement of the indices and what ultimately sums over them that matters.
In truth, I think you'll have to let go of trying to maintain a correspondence between index notation and matrix notation. Matrices will not help you when you start dealing with 3-index tensors or higher. It is helpful to keep thinking of tensors as linear transformations--it's just that, unlike matrices, these transformations can have more than one argument.