I don't know if I can explain this well. The effect is best visible when you keep your hand in front of a light source. When I'm almost about to touch any 2 fingers (assume between your thumb and index finger), it appears as if a band of few black lines originate from the index finger and mysteriously reaches the thumb. Form the center of those lines ( which look concave in shape relative to the index finger) my skin kind of peels out. It feels like a bridge or interaction between the fingers. Can someone explain this optical phenomenon?

I just don't know how to type this on google. Note that index finger is alternative term for pointer finger.

Secondly, when I stare at a light source at night by painfully half closing the eyelids it appears like beams of light emerge from it. I'm seriously honest here. (especially street lights or even CFL's). Also I can see this beam always in one direction, for me in this case it is vertically up (j cap.) Then in the (-j cap ) direction the light ray appears but very feebly and multicolored. Now I can't be seeing light itself for the following reason:

seeing means photons hitting the retina. Seeing an object means photons bouncing off that object hitting our retina. By the same logic seeing light means photons bouncing off from 'light' and reaching our retina but photons don't repel each other or don't bounce off each other presumably due to their wave nature (practically light can't bounce off light). But there is this 2nd possibility that we simply see light ( photons) from the source itself but in that case when photon enters our eyes, we receive information carried by it but we have destroyed the object(the photon) we are looking at itself(as the retina has absorbed the photon). Conclusion : We can't see light itself

Also by logic it can't be dust particles scattering light because once I stop focusing I can't see light beams anymore. What am I missing? The reason I clubbed these questions is that they appear to be due to the same underlying principle if I am not wrong.

Any help is eagerly awaited here!!!!