I have variously heard people describe the no-cloning theorem as an essential feature of "quantum physics", akin to saying "we cannot copy arbitrary quantum information to arbitrary precision". However, this question is about the interpretation of the quantum result only insofar as this sheds light on the classical result presented in the course of the question.
The basic formal statement of the theorem is that given a Hilbert space $H$, there is no unitary operator $U : H \otimes H \to H \otimes H$ such that $$ U (\lvert a \rangle \otimes \lvert b\rangle) = \lvert a\rangle \otimes \lvert a\rangle$$ for all $\lvert a\rangle \in H$ and a "blank" state $\lvert b\rangle$. The question is, is anything about this result surprising or "quantum" from the viewpoint of classical mechanics?
Here's an argument that "no-cloning" also holds in classical mechanics, taken almost verbatim from "There's no cloning in symplectic mechanics" by Fenyes:
Let $(M,\omega)$ be a symplectic manifold, the $\omega$ is the symplectic form that encodes what we physicists call the Poisson bracket by $\omega(X_f,X_g) = \{f,g\}$ where $X_f$ is the vector field defined by $\mathrm{d} f = \omega(X_f,-)$. Then all physical motions on $M$ are symplectomorphisms, i.e. functions $M\to M$ that preserve $\omega$, because they are integral flows of the Hamiltonian vector field $X_H$ which is a symplectic vector field by construction.
The combined phase space of two systems $(M,\omega),(M',\omega')$ is $(M\times M',\omega + \omega')$, where $\times$ is the Cartesian product of manifolds. Now, the classical analogue to the no-cloning theorem would clearly be the statement that there is no symplectomorphism $\phi : M\times M\to M\times M$ such that $$ \phi(a,b) = \phi(a,a)$$ for all $a\in M$ and a blank state $b\in M$. And, indeed, this is true:
Let $u,v\in T_{(b,b)} (M\times M)$ be tangent vectors at $(b,b)$. Since $\phi(x,b) = (x,x)$ by assumption, curves $(\gamma(t),b)$ starting at $(b,b)$ get mapped to curves $(\gamma(t),\gamma(t))$ starting at $(b,b)$, and so $\mathrm{d} \phi_{(b,b)} (w,0) = (w,w)$ for all $w\in T_{(b,b)}(M\times M)$. Therefore, \begin{align} & (\omega + \omega)((u,0),(v,0)) = (\omega + \omega)((u,u),(v,v)) \\ \implies & \omega(u,v) + \omega(0,0) = \omega(u,v) + \omega(u,v) \\ \implies & \omega(u,v) = 0\end{align} which is a contradiction because symplectic forms are non-degenerate by definition. Therefore, no classical Hamiltonian cloning map exists.
So, what does this result actually show? Are the assumptions of the no-cloning theorem silly and the desired cloning map does not actually reflect what we mean by being able to copy arbitrary information in either case? Is there a subtle difference between the classical and the quantum setting which makes the assumptions silly in the classical, but not in the quantum setting? If the assumptions are not silly, then what is the significance of the classical result?