I'm trying to understand tensor notation and working with indices in special relativity. I use a book for this purpose in which $\eta_{\mu\nu}=\eta^{\mu\nu}$ is used for the metric tensor and a vector is transformed according to the rule $$x'^\mu= \Lambda^\mu{}_{\alpha}x^\alpha$$ (Lorentz-transformation).
I think I understand what is going on up to this point but now, I'm struggling to understand how the following formula works:
$$\eta_{\nu\mu}\Lambda^{\mu}{}_{\alpha}\eta^{\alpha\kappa} ~=~ \Lambda_{\nu}{}^{\kappa}$$
Why is this not equal to (for instance) $\Lambda^{\kappa}{}_{\nu}$? In addition, I have trouble understanding what the difference is between $\Lambda_\alpha^{\ \ \beta}$, $\Lambda_{\ \ \alpha}^\beta$, $\Lambda^\alpha_{\ \ \beta}$ and $\Lambda^{\ \ \alpha}_\beta$ (order and position of indices). And if we write tensors as matrices, which indices stand for the rows and which ones stand for the columns?
I hope someone can clarify this to me.